then again... maybe not.


i dream of nothing that i remember of, and i wake up to daydream of suicide, death, judgement day, massacare, carnage, marcabre, and termination of all and all....
maybe to make up for my lost dreams.

i think of a lot of things, and one can call them wistful thoughts.
then i feel myself getting closer to all these thoughts that noone has ever given a damn to... day by day, thought by thought.

i feel that my life is nothing great, like nobody dares to tell me.
but i keep it going, keeping my daydreams the way they are.... mindless daydreams.

i believe i love this person so much... i could never love another being more than the love i feel now...
but belief is not a reflection of truth.

... ... and it is painful to snuff out this ray of hope you'd embraced for every hurdle you'd crossed... ... with your own hands.

wow~*

i didn't blog for 1 whole month.






let's









keep it that way. =)

happy birthday to someone who brings happiness into my life without realizing it.



may you find your one special being who can brighten your life no matter what happens....
.... like the angel i found in you.

Happy Birthday

happy birthday to someone who is unaware of what is coming her way....



6, 7 years of care and understanding... ...
everyday is a present to me.

today, this present from me....
what to say?



please fill the blanks: __________________________________________ (for lynn)

i am curious and panting to know everything,
but my turn never comes.

it is always floating elsewhere within sight, out of reach.
looking real enough, but everybit a lie... somehow.

i know of nothing solid enough to support my excuse for exiling oneself from these games.
still i cling on to these silly, invalid excuses and tell the whole world nevertheless....
just to do things my way ---- probably a wrong way.

i am curious and dying to know why things always turn out this way in life.
but i don't think there is an answer......



... or i would have known it long time ago.

if life can come to you with choice like a dinner menue,
will you choose this kind of life?



if not, what will you choose and why?



then, are you sure you will have no problems with it eventually?

(play it)



angels don't dwell in heavens.
angels live among the commoners.
the good, the bad, and the damned.


angels don't come with sms.
angels come when the lights go out.
with darkness, and make you lighten your darkened world...
by bringing the lost smile back where it belongs...
on your face.





angels are not immortal.
which is why they are angels in the first place...
to be doing what they are doing,
when they are just another commoner like us.



deepest thanks, to the five angels that always arrive in time to salvage my live.

this is how i feel.



this is how i carry my life.

me.

and my canon s400




and i want school work to leave me alone.

because i want to sleep more.

i once thought of this-- this life i'm living now, not the one 4 days ago.
and told myself it is so far away, it'll almost, never come.

this is the second time i think of this life.
and it is already here.

maybe i should have faith
maybe i should have think of him a little bit less.
maybe then, he'll come into my life as soon as this life i'd never gave a second thought about until now.


isn't this ironic.



you'll always look the same to me
and i'll always feel the same for you.

My name is: Iris
I may seem: bimbotic
But I'm really: not that stupid, and my brain is not that small
People who know me think I'm: .... how would i know? (i never did ask them...)
If you knew me you'd probably: consider turning back the clock
Sometimes I feel: horny... but that's really my business
In the morning I: wake up?
I like to sleep: yes i do. (it helps to slim one down)
If I could be doing anything right now I would be: together with my love one
Money is: important
One thing I wish I had is: money
One thing I have that I wish I didn't: a flat nose
What I don't need: to work with others
If I had one wish it would be: my parents to be happy
Love: myself, my belongings, iori yagami
My body:i've got a stout waist, flabby arms, and, surprisingly, an 8-head figure
If an angel flew into my window at night I would: tell it: "dun bluff." and nail it to my wall as a decoration
If a demon crashed into my window I would: ask it to pay for the damages, then nail it to my wall beside the angel
If I could see one person right now it would be: captain jack sparrow
Something I want but I don't really need is: a sharp and pointed nose
Something I need but I don't really want is: living with people
I live for: .... what?
I dare you to: sorry, i don't dare anyone.
I am afraid of: ka-zua, being fat, most dogs, most insects actually (but i REALLY scared of ka-zua)
It makes me angry when: people around me did things that are disrespectful to me
I dream about: marrying an evil being
I daydream about: being a movie star in hollywood
My ideal mate would: be iori yagami, though i'm not sure he feels the same.
My ideal life would be: one with iori somewhere in it.
One thing I know that I will never be able to do: have sex
If I could change one thing about myself physically, it would be: sharp nose please
I am disappointed with: singaporeans
I am elated with: ..... how to answer?

i want a man who knows how to respect me.
i think it is the least and the most a man can offer me.

i want a man who loves me for who i am, no matter what i become, how i appear, now, then, and in the future.
i think he could help me come to grip with my life, by loving me so much...
convince me to love myself again.

i want to wait no more.
i think i'd been patient.
i think i deserve to know, whether he is ever to come to me.
if he is not, i'll go and look for him.
if there is no such person, i'll find and make one for myself.
i want to wait no more.

Goddess of the Night. Beautiful yet a strange
darkness and sadness lurk about you.


What element would you rein over? (For Girls)
brought to you by Quizilla

Sans Frill. Ah. Understated. Very understated.


Can I Label You? [For girls only. Gender imbalanced people do not apply]
brought to you by Quizilla

(there's a Johnny Depp as a choice for the last question....)






n_n* i'm so happy. (jacky-tweet-tweet)

... ... who isn't?

how do you tell if someone is telling the "truth" about you?

when he says you are what you think you are,
or when he claims to see you as someone you never imagined yourself to be?

what will you do when you want to find out the "truth" about yourself?

A GAME-BOY. Youre like a tomboy without the love of
sports. Reality sucks, but as long as you have
your electronics you feel you can cope. Time
goes unnoticed when youre locked in your room
hooked up to your Nintendo, rocking to your
favourite collection of guitar-driven albums.
Your virtues: Intelligence, sense-of-humour,
individuality.
Your flaws: Inability to cope with real life,
action-freak spirit, reclusive nature.
EXTRA: Your personality type is the only one on
this quiz that would enjoy www.life-
blood.cjb.net. Check it out!


What kind of girl are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


and is this what you've always convinced yourself to be... ?

from today onwards, i'll sail my own ship on the seven seas....
to find the seven unaccomplished dreams i've always hold dearly to my heart.

i am the captain of an immortal vessel with no crew,
and the pirate of all dream snatchers.

i am....


Duh. You are "But WHY's the rum gone?!"
You're not the smartest one in the bunch, but
you're sweetly appealing and you don't let
disappointment get to you. Everybody
identifies with you, because let's face it, why
IS the rum gone?


Which one of Captain Jack Sparrow's bizarre sayings from Pirates of the Caribbean are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

take my hand, and wake me up from this never-ending slumber.

kiss my hand, so that i know this dream has become reality.



let the world bleed, and sky crumble...

for we are meant for each other.

you and me, together...

now and forever.

in life, you decide what are the things you want to keep on your mind,
and what are the things that you will forget.



i want to slim down my flabby arms and waist.

i want to have a better complexion.

i need more money.

i want to handle all my schoolwork perfectly.

i want to see the people i like face to face.

i want my parents to be happy.

i want to be happy.

i want a lover.


it's all about me now.

you can come for me anytime you like.
i already had my luggage packed.

so many times in this game, i waited in vain for you.
where you'd gone to?
is my name on your list? will you add it in please?

sorry i can't bring myself to you.
i don't have the guts to.

i hope you come to me gently,
in the middle of my sleep.
when noone's looking, lead me away.
i really don't enjoy playing this game.


you can come for me anytime you like.
i already had my luggage packed.

things always go where they don't belong in life.


if i'm god, i would have a lot of manouvering to do with this world.
if i'm in charge, i will fix all those "impossible" problems with one touch.
if everyone listens to me, i'll never weep.
if i can change things just by thinking, he will never be like this.

sadly, i'm not a deity: the world manouvers me.
sadly, i was never in charge: problems stay the way they are.
sadly, nobody quite listens when i speak,
and i can't change anything just by thinking...

but i'm not ashamed, because we're all the same.
in this world we don't belong, nobody has the right to say who's right...
or who's wrong.
so am i wrong, or am i right,
to say things always go where they don't belong in life?

when will i "grow up" and stop relying on other people?
what is the definition of a "grown up"?


you don't have to hurry me,
cause i am already on my way....
you don't really know what you are saying,
and you don't want to know what i'll turn out to be...
eventually.

you don't have to scream at me,
cause i am not listening.
you don't seem to know,
and you don't give a damn
as to how much we care.

so why should i compromise anymore?
i'm on this one way road all alone...
losing myself as i go.
the devil's knocking on my door.
should i flee or answer his call?

it's really all up to me...
i listen to nobody.




Acoustic #3 - Goo Goo Dolls

They painted up your secrets
With the lies they told to you
And the least they ever gave you
Was the most you ever knew

And I wonder where these dreams go
When the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screaming
No one's listening anyway

Your voice is small and fading
And you hide in here unknown
And your mother loves your father
Cause she's got nowhere to go

And she wonders where these dreams go
Cause the world got in her way
What's the point in ever trying
Nothing's changing anyway

They press their lips against you
And you love the lies they say
And I tried so hard to reach you
But you're falling anyway

And you know I see right through you
Cause the world gets in your way
What's the point in all this screaming
You're not listening anyway

What color are you? (Anime Pictures)
brought to you by Quizilla

Thanks for dropping the Goos a line at googoodolls.com...

We try to read every email that comes in and respond when time allows... obviously
we can't write everyone back so if you don't get a response please don't be discouraged!
Visit googoodolls.com and write us again...


i don't expect a respond.
i am just a nobody.


.... and i can't fight the tears that ain't coming,
or the moment of truth in my lies.
when everything feels like the movies,
i bleed just to know i'm alive

and i don't want the world to see me,
cause i don't think that they'd understand.
when everything's made to be broken....

i just want you to know who i am.

You are.. UNIQUE! Wow, you are a rare breed. You do
what you want, say what you want, and wear what
you want. Screw labels and subcultures! You may
be considered one of the oddest people in your
school, but you really could care less. What
matters is what you like, and what you like
only. You're a shining star!


The Subculture Label Quiz
brought to you by Quizilla

who will be the one i'll call?
if i jump he breaks my fall, lift me up and fly away with me into the night?

if i need to fall apart, like a mended broken heart...
if i need to crash,
i'll crash and burn: i'm all alone.




me.

only i can see what i see from where i'm standing.
only i can decide, what to do from what i see.



I feel what only I can feel
And if that don't appeal to you
Let me know
And I'll go
'Cuz I flow
Better when my colors show
And that's the way it has to be
Honestly

If you're trying to turn me into someone else
Its easy to see I'm not down with that
I'm not nobody's fool
If you're trying to turn me into something else
I've seen enough and I'm over that
I'm not nobody's fool
If you wanna bring me down
Go ahead and try



Go ahead and try

one day, the man i love with my heart and soul will come to me
and ask me to be with him forever.

on such a day, this girl who love him with her heart and soul will tell him
no and walk away from him.



If I could say what I want to say,
I'd say I wanna blow you away.
Be with you every night,
Am I squeezing you too tight?

If I could say what I want to see,
I want to see you go down on one knee...
Marry me today.

Yes, I�m wishing my life away....
...With these things I�ll never say

These things I�ll never say

i am not afraid of death....
... i just don't want to lose all memories i have now.